Having been a member of the Toastmasters Club, I like to think that writing and giving toasts are right up my alley. However, putting this together and delivering it proved to be more challenging than I had anticipated.

First, my friend drives me crazy half the time and writing this, I realised that I took a lot of her amazing qualities for granted.

Next, I didn’t have a copy of the reception programme so I was surprised when, just as I was about to leave the venue to fetch the bride’s reception dress, the MC was calling for the Maid of Honour to give a toast! I was flustered and I think it showed. There was a little sweat in my eye so I could not read my crumpled notes. I did most of the speech by heart and forgot a few lines.

Finally, someone should have told me that at Nigerian weddings, the crowd out back doesn’t really care what’s going on up front. I was distracted by the ruckus, stuttered a lot and wished to God my toast was shorter.

Despite my less than stellar performance and to my surprise, a few people told me they enjoyed my toast. Sincere or not, it was consoling to know that at least one or two persons actually listened to what I had to say.

I’m sharing this with you in case you ever need a template or something for a toast. Please critic it and let me know what you think.

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Mommies and daddies, Ladies and Gentlemen, a very good evening to you all. I am Red, friend of the bride and designated wedding gown-chaser of the day.

First, I would like to thank everyone here today for taking this time to celebrate the union of this beautiful couple and the happiness of my best friend.

Since we met in the University of Benin during our ugly-duckling days, Shortie and I have managed to put up with each other for the past 16 years.

In this time we have followed each other almost everywhere. She moved to Lagos, and 2 years later I moved to Lagos. I moved to Abuja and 2 years later she moved to Abuja. Now, she’s moving to her husband’s house and in the next 2 years, I’m not sure how the next move will pen out.

The first time I visited an orphanage home was of course, by following Shortie. She is brave enough to meet these people in person and confront their suffering and humanity. She’s a genuinely caring and generous person, always willing to share and make sacrifices for people who need it.

She’s super resourceful, independent and one of the most hardworking women I know, and finally, she is an amazing cook, and on Sundays, I try to visit with an empty stomach because there’s sure to be a large pot of fried rice and chicken.

Tallie is an absolute gentleman and I knew he was the one because once they started dating, my friend was almost always laughing anyhow, and sounded genuinely happy.

Now, I’ve attended a lot of weddings and the Number 1 advice to the couple is always “Be patient oooohhh”. So, be patient and be kind to each other. You’ll get upset at one another, but try not to say mean or hurtful things.

Love is not proud, so learn to apologise and admit that you might have been wrong or made a mistake. And then, forgive each other and try not to sleep angry because it causes bad dreams and wrinkles.

Finally, remember to pray together, particularly for each other, because those who put their trust in God are like Mount Zion; they cannot be shaken, but will endure forever.

May your love endure forever.

To Tallie and Shortie.

**Obviously, all names and identifying details of the individuals have been changed to protect their privacy and mine.

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I’m looking forward to your feedback and comments and as always, thank you for reading!
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